Not All Who Wander Are Lost……But Some Are and That’s OK

Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive. – Howard Thurman

This is one of my absolute favorite quotes of all time. I have loved it for as long as I can remember. (Or more accurately, since about my freshmen year of college.) I am currently participating in the Free Range Humans course designed by Marianne Cantwell and it is amazing! I’m only on what is referred to as the “defrosting” week but I already love it. On Friday I will begin Week 1 and delve into figuring out what I want to do with my life instead of being stuck behind a desk until the end of all time. Don’t get me wrong, that is totally fine for some, just not for me. I graduated with a degree in Hotel, Restaurant and Tourism Management from the University of Wisconsin – Stout. After working as a food & beverage manager, server, bartender, and as a property manager for both residential and commercial properties, I really need to get my shit together.

Pardon my French but I am so exhausted. I am exhausted with this “stuck” feeling that has been dragging me down and I am physically and mentally exhausted as well. (I have taken up a part-time serving job to pay off student loans.) It is hard my friends! Your 20’s is harder than everybody makes it look. And more than anything I am needing to refocus and center in this crazy world. Due to some recent events in my life I am dedicating this year to me. That means no more negativity, no more unnecessary drama and no more nonsense from others. It is just me.

Where will it lead me? I have no idea. Actually, I have lots of ideas. For things I want to do, for the woman I want to become. But, I need to dig deep down and find what’s inside this heart of mine. I am positive that my internal compass already has a path for me if I can just make myself listen. I’m scared and nervous because I am laying my heart out here on the operating table with no clue of what the outcome will be. I know there is no in between though. I will either make it through or flat-line and since I’m not much of a quitter I don’t see the second one as an option.

So, here I am taking a leap into this year long journey of self-discovery and finding that passion which makes my heart beat with crazy intensity. I will be laying it all out right here every single step of the way. I’m so ready for this. I am ready to be vulnerable and exposed, to embrace the ideal and the messy. To find my direction and most importantly, to find myself. Because somewhere along the way I lost that girl who was so curious and laughed at everything this beautiful life had to offer. I’d really like to get her back.

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